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This is Twinkie Pie. He is a double alpha male cat that wont let ANYONE touch his paws – except a certain Ginger who can do whatever she wants and he is ok with it.
This week we played dnd and it was fun. We are playing the newly released “Murder in Baldurs Gate” as an into into a Heroes of the Lance Dragonlance campaign.
We were walking through town, Baldurs Gate, on a day of celebration when the God of Assassins was finally killed by the Duke who is also the city’s patron and most famous resident. It was a festival day and the heroes (we are calling them that though its accuracy is dubious at best) took pat in games of skill and chance. The bard perfomred an excellent rendition of Arry Pooter.
Much archery was loosed, some excellent jousting was perfromed, with the final round between the dragonborn paladin on her giant sugar-bear mount versus the elf ranger on her Acherai – a four legged flamingo mount. I cant even remember who won, but it was epic. Oh yes, each of them did excellently and won a pair of the duke’s daughter’s scarves. It was due to a wardrobe malfunction that the paladin was thrown by the ranger in the last round.
Finally, the group engaged a group of 7 thugs in a mock battle. This meant attacking to subdue only, which meant some spells and weapons were unavailable, like crossbows and magic missiles for example. The party won, and then the free beer was released to the crowds in giant barrels around the town square. City nobles came up on stage including Fancy Filosi, Jambunathon Boehner, Bitch Baconnel (short for Bitchell), and world famous Duke Bo Robama.
They tried to give some speeches that were topical and cross referenced our own current ongoing struggles with government in a way that inspires dialogue, but the players wanted one of that, they wanted to bust more heads, so I obliged. Crossbowmen opened up on the crowd from second story windows while the thugs from earlier started kill9ing an wounding panicked civilians in a wanton slaughter. Meanwhile Duke Bo Robama was fighting for his life against a crazed old man with a short sword who called himself Darth Yoda.
The battle is crazy and when the old man is killed, the duke explodes and turns into some disgusting monster all tooth and claws. It ends up swallowing the gnome cleric, then the evil wizard who went in after her, before being killed by a combination of attacks from Jillian the highly skilled weapon mistress and the paleolithic tribal duo Male Human Bard and Female Elf Ranger. The kender spent the entirety of all three battles looting corpses as they fell. She also “found” a divan at one point, which aided the heroes in their fight against the thugs.
Image may be NSFW.
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